I came across an ad on craigslist the other day and thought to myself, “I want this man”; then I remembered I will be turning 38 in 9 days, have fibroids, sagging breasts, cellulite and stretch marks, suffer with depression and agoraphobia, run a home-based business that’s made me less than $5000 this year, and have a near dead libido.  I couldn’t land a desperate, blind 92-year old grade-school drop-out much less a handsome 40-year old Yale graduate. Besides, I’m already married.

You, however, might just be the perfect lady for this gentleman who describes himself as not rich but not poor either.
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Here’s something you don’t read everyday. Some young man in his sexual prime referring to himself as “a filthy rich accident of the universe” with “oodles of everything that you could possibly want in a man”, is looking for a lady who likes arson, cunnilingus and magic tricks, among other things. Is this you? Do you like arson, cunnilingus and magic tricks? If yes, you might indeed be the perfect match for this self-admitted nut case.

In all likelihood this ad was placed by a kidder who is in no way serious about anything he’s said, including the part about being filthy rich, but hey, you never know right? Unlikely does not equal impossible.
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Note: The photo shown is not the 65-year old man being mentioned. This is a BDegan Flickr photo

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Are you an attractive, classy woman who falls between the ages of 25 – 39? There is a 65-year old multi-millionaire who is interested in meeting you.

This gentleman describes himself as an Ivy League educated former CEO of a corporate enterprise. He claims to be in good health and looking closer to mid-fifties than mid 60s. He says he lives an active lifestyle that involves golf, skiing, tennis, boating, frequent travel. ( Sounds a little suspect given the age but…)

He has no children and is widowed ( No one to contest his will once he leaves his fortune to you).
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There’s a gentleman in the New York area who would like to hear from you. This gentleman did not exactly say he’s rich; but he did say he’s successful.

He describes himself as a good-looking, single white male.

Age: 43

Height: 5’10″

Seeking: Attractive Asian lady.

He’ll be judging you by your photo only, apparently, as he didn’t list any specific preferences other than that you must be Asian and must send him your photo.

If you’re interested reply to box 5755 via New York Magazine (nymag.com). He’s interested in a meaningful relationship. Wouldn’t it be nice to snare the millionaire and get a meaningful relationship as icing? Or should it be meaningful relationship with millionaire husband as icing?

Note: Image is a stock photo and is not of the gentleman referenced.

There’s a self-described good-looking professional 53 year old, sensitive, intelligent, romantic man with a heart of gold and an interest in politics, finance, fine restaurants, sports and looking at the ocean ( more-so when it is calm than during tsunamis ), who is looking for you.

Oh, you can also be living in New Jersey. By Brazillian he probably means an Adriana Lima, Alessandra Ambrosio, Isabel Goulart or Gisele Bundchen lookalike. Sounds like you? Hurry on over to nymag.com’s personal’s section. His box number is # 5754. Send him and note and a photo and let us know how it turns out.

If you’re not a beautiful Brazillian woman under 48 and living in Manhattan don’t despair, your Mr. Right and Rich will turn up soon enough. In the meantime, I still think you’re better off trying to get rich on your own but I’m making pennies a day. You’re probably better off listening to someone like Ginie Polo Sayles than to me. She thinks that you can get rich faster marrying a rich man than you can on your own.

Note: Image shown is only a stock photo and not a picture of the gentleman in question

The headline pretty much says what needs to be said. If you are conservative at work but liberal in the bedroom, extraordinary and know there is no such word as “conversate”, there’s a professional white male who might be looking for you. He placed his ad all the way back in January so he might have already found what he was looking for; but you never know. He might still be looking and you might just be perfect for him.

This gentleman was needing to find someone with whom he could spend time when in New York. He’s a business man who travels frequently. According to his self-description he is well-tailored, well-traveled, and well-educated; 6’2, blonde with a hint of gray, has green eyes, has tattoos, has an Ivy League education.
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If you’re fun, energetic and make for a nice car interior decorative piece, there’s a 23 year old former investment banker and entrepreneur who might be interested in meeting you. His only requirements are that you look good in an Aston Martin when in London and even better in a Ferari F430 when in Los Angeles. Seems the guy lives in London so you should probably live there yourself. You should also probably take his ad with a grain of salt.

A 23-year old investment banker who has done so well for himself already that’s he’s been able to afford to retire and he’s having to resort to taking out an ad on an obscure website? Seems highly unlikely; but in the event you might want to take your chances, here’s the ad: Ridiculously rich man looking for a nice girl

Image shown is not related to the post.

Image credit: icanteachyouhowtodoit via flickr