Depression alcohol over-eating

Dear diary, my anxiety was out of control today and I overate. I feel disgusted with myself for being weak, but I know that the best thing to do at this point is to try to regroup because if I get angry and filled with self-loathing I’ll just continue to overeat out of frustration and depression. I’m also craving alcohol and that tells me that I might have developed a problem. I’ve never been a drinker, but if alcohol is purchased and brought into the house and I’m feel stressed I’ll drink it. Alcohol is so seldom brought into the house that the fact that I am craving alcohol tells me that I have indeed been using it as a way to relieve my stress at those times when it has been available. The times have been rare. Every few months my husband might buy a bottle of wine or a bottle or rum. I’d estimate he has brought alcohol into the house about 8 times in the last year and that’s a big number for us. And we don’t drink outside the house. We don’t go out to bars and drink or go out to restaurants and drink or anything like that. But I guess even though we don’t drink regularly, when I have had access I’ve misused alcohol and now, on some sub-conscious level, I’m thinking of alcohol as an elixir. I have gotten to where I think drinking will get rid of the stress and depression. It tells me that at all cost I need to make sure that no alcohol comes into the house from now on. I believe I might be in danger of developing a drinking problem.

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